My phone has this feature where the screen stays on if I’m looking at it…

Now if only my eyes glowed in the dark.

unclefather:

things people have yelled in a bath and body works store:

• “what the fuck is a eucalyptus” 
• “this smells like my grandma”
• “what the fuck does “wood” smell like”
• “this is bullshit i’m going home”

(Source: chickensandwich, via ikillzombiesforfun)

juicy-bliss:

i don’t want to go to school i don’t want to go to university i don’t want to have a career i don’t want anyone to expect anything of me ever ever ever i just want to sit in a cocoon of blankets all day every day sleeping and reading books because i don’t think i’m cut out for this whole ‘contributing member of society’ thing

(Source: doonad, via jungle-fever-made-me-do-it)

profrumbleroar:

mountincest:

lovemetoinfinity:

fatdough:

rewind-and-restart:

mountincest:

school doesnt even test your intelligence it tests your memory

it tests my patience

it tests my ability to hold my pee

it tests my ability to keep calm and not slap a bitch

whoa

There are four types of people at school.

First you have your Ravenclaws

then your Hufflepuffs

then your Gryffindors

and lastly, your Slytherins.

(via gendrybaratheon)

kawaii-santa-chan:

kawaii-santa-chan:

kawaii-santa-chan:

there is no teacher in my history class rn and we are all just sitting here and being really quiet and whenever somebody opens the door, everyone turns around because we think its a sub but its not and then we just shush whoever walks in

update: we’re taking attendance and sending it down so nobody suspects that we dont have a teacher

UPDATE: THE PRINCIPLE WALKED IN AND DIDNT NOTICE ANYTHING

(Source: stridazzle, via b-u-g-s-y)

(Source: teenagahworld, via bigmacstrikesagain)